Two weeks...had a small meltdown yesterday. Called my Dad, we talked for a little bit. I melted because my brother wrote an article on facebook about my aunt, Barbara Jean. She was the most beautiful, loving person. She had a way of making everyone feel special; and really held the family together. He wrote this beautiful essay about his memory of her and Celine Dion's song "Because You Loved Me". All the family members who read it left notes of crying wherever they were.
Anyway, I thought about her and my uncle, Harry Benjamin and my aunt Bonnie Benjamin. I thought how I wouldn't be able to invite any of these people I love to my show. I thought about how much they supported me being an artist and different from the beginning. And, yes I know they will be there in spirit; but yesterday, it just hit me that I won't see them in the audience and I just started crying.
So I called my Dad, and was crying and trying to talk about it; probably sounding like a whining version of the Charlie Brown adults. But he talked to me and I took some breaths. It's interesting what makes you miss the people you lose. It's also important to have this work mean something to their memories.
I hope Uncle Harry, Aunt Bonnie and Aunt Bobbie know how much I love and miss them.
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