12 Days after Curtain...

It's early. It's been raining the last few days, making me a little creaky in my joints. I received a beautiful journal from the cast that they signed at the cast party Saturday. Very beautiful and thoughtful. We got word that the SF Theater festival is accepting applications for this August's festival. Shows are to be no longer than 30 minutes; but I think if we come up with a "preview" type show, we can promote for the second run. The main thing is to figure out how to tell a cohesive story in 30 minutes, possibly just the "set-up" so that folks will want to see the show.

We went over the receipts; and for limited financing, we did pretty good. No profit, but we didn't lose that much relatively speaking, either. Got some next steps to keep you posted on...

9 days after curtain...

It was such a nice party. We had a great time. I gave the cast their awards tonight, and the appreciation certificates for the crew. I also got a chance to really appreciate Klara for all the work and dedication that she's had on the project. I know over the years she's felt that she hasn't done much; but I told her that she was there at the critical times when I needed her. She showed up when I was scared and overwhelmed by this process. That's not nothing. She has been a great friend and hard worker; and I want her to know how much she has done for us. Handled the things that were difficult for me, gave time, resources, and more. It is really great to work with her.

My next personal steps are cleaning my house/purging unnecessary things; planning the next phase of the show, and writing the next story in the Midnight Series. Mostly, moving forward with my life. Firstborn has finished its first chapter. Oh the places we will go! Chapter two is on the horizon...

8 days after curtain...

I can breathe again. We finally went through all the finances and have gotten all our outstanding stuff situated. YAY! That was a huge source of stress for me. Now I feel like I can really party with the cast tonight. It's our cast party. I also got a chance to talk to the actor that I was crying about for not being able to do the next run; and it was good. We're in each other's Soul Circle. Family. That makes me feel so much better.

We wanted to do t-shirts and stuff for tonight, but it was still a little tight financially so, we have to wait. My next goals with the show are to revamp, tighten and get it up again, this time with a marketing team that can really get it out there and pack the house every night. I have an interview on Hard Knock Radio on Monday, pretty excited about that. I definitely am focusing on keeping our momentum; giving myself a chance to rest and recoup as well. I think I need a little weekend away, by the water for sure.

Tonight, we celebrate our successes; laugh at our mistakes, and connect again with the new family we've created.

Image: Lara Amin

5 days after curtain...

I feel all kindsa crazy. I feel like I didn't necessarily relish the play; or even take in that it was ACTUALLY happening. Then I found out my sister is really hurt about some of the stuff in the play. It's hard because I never wanted to hurt anyone. That makes me really sad. We haven't talked yet, but I hope to talk to her soon. I hope she knows how much I love her and how much she means to me. It's hard when there's even a little bit of your personal life in a fictionalized piece because people know who they are; but they may not know where they end/you & the character begin, and where the character is different.

I also found out a cast member won't be coming back for the second run; not because of anything personal, but their own life. I found myself very weepy about it, and still want to cry. I know things change and life is what it is...but I will really miss them, and their presence and interpretation of the character made the journey so much more enjoyable, especially during the tough times.

I'm not really sure what the rest of the week is going to be like. I went back to work, and am looking forward to the cast party this Saturday. I think I just need to be quiet and reflective more than anything else; and hopefully can acknowledge that I was able to reach one of my long-held goals.

3 days after curtain...

It finally hit me as we were packing up props and things last night...we put on a show. We did it. It happened. We all came together and were successful! What a phenomenal beginning becoming a better director. This time, I had so much more life experience to bring; and although I know the next run will still need some reworking and tweaking, I didn't let the show not being totally perfect stop me from putting something meaningful into the world. I didn't let the story being so personal and raw for me stop me either. I didn't let people's adverse reactions to the subject matter shut me down. So it is a lot. And I am grateful.

We've been asked to come back to the Black Rep, so I'll be keeping you posted on that and blogging the second run.

2 days after curtain...

Last night was amazing. We ran so much more smoothly than opening night. We also had made some changes to the show before we opened that were moving and startling last night with Roman and Daja. I'd love to have another run of the show in the very near future. I think we are just getting a momentum going and could really use another weekend run to get the show perfect.

My family was there. It was beautiful. My father, my mother, both my sisters and all my nieces. I didn't get all weepy opening night, but seeing my mom and dad out in the audience teary-eyed I almost lost it; but had made a pact with myself not to run my make-up...lol.

Another wonderful job by the cast. Today we have a Q&A with me and the cast. Looking forward to that. We lost a few audience members last night. Some at intermission, and some after the SCENE. I got to hear recounts of all kinds of reactions from different people. The best was just sitting in the audience and hearing people experience the show; hearing them laugh and cry, cheering for the family. It really moved me. I also see where I need to tweak things for the next run.

I am so grateful for this experience.

14 hours after Curtain...

First night down! It was an amazing thing! Full house of people, lotsa love in the room; familiar faces and surprise visits. I got a chance to connect with the cast before hand; I really wanted to give them their space before the show. I wanted them to know how much I appreciated all their dedication and love. I wanted them to know how much work they've done, and how proud I am of them. I had to let my little birds fly.

I didn't really know what to do with myself last night. I didn't want to be around the cast for fear of micro managing, I didn't want to be around the stage floor crew because they always got something going on that will drive me nuts; but they always fix it--so I definitely leave them to their own devices... I didn't want to mingle with audience too much. I felt like it was my birthday when I was little. I just wanted to read a book in my room by myself while everyone enjoyed the party.

The cast was so amazing. I sat in the audience and just watched all the work we had put in over the last 8 weeks pay off. There were a few lighting snafus the cast rolled with seamlessly; I knew they were there. I found out that the lighting crew can't hear the work on stage for the cues; and if the cast changes a cue they were used to, they get thrown off. Today: strong baby monitor for them.

The show is gonna be over before you know it, it's crazy. Come Monday, I'm having to work on our next run. Very exiting. Tonight my family comes.

Photo: Eduardo Soler

20 hours 'til curtain...

The last few days have been a gotdang show within themselves. I've laughed, cried, screamed (both out loud and at people), and been really grateful. Last night was the first and only night we had a FULL rehearsal with everything in place (yes, the day before the show). We stayed late last night to go through the whole show twice. I felt bad because so many of the cast work day jobs, but we needed to get it right. I didn't spend time tweaking the scenes, we just ran through it and I gave notes in between the first and second run through.

I must say that although Tuesday I was ready to give somebody a hard backhand (Ike Turner-style); and was really not trying to let anyone catch it undeservedly, it wasn't until Wednesday that I was able to really calm down. The set was ridiculously behind, and having to deal with difficult personalities was no fun. I didn't want to pull everything together at the last minute; but there were things out of my control that I had to get over quickly--even though I was really pissed.

One thing that has been challenging is the level of anxiety that I've had over the last few days. Bursting into tears during the day; being worried, but once I see the cast working wherever we have had to make do, they amaze me and remind me of all the work we did up until this point that's paying off now.

Most things have been taken care of outside the show. Klara and Darice have been awesome. My mother and sisters have been my backbone. My mom baked us a cake yesterday--so sweet. I can get a few hours sleep before I'm up and at it again.

This is really exciting!

5 days 'til curtain...

What a weekend! Oh my goodness...both productive and super emotional; but I am grateful for where we are now. Tonight we were on Qui's world, a blog radio station with Dee Dee (Claudine), LaToya (Daja), Derric (Amir) and Lisa (Multiple Roles). It was great to talk with the cast to prep for the show. It really was a boost in the arm after a challenging week. I really liked seeing the cast in action and talking about the roles and what the project means to them; and how it's impacted them.

This week was all about communication and decisions. The show was running long, so I had to cut some things and still may need to cut more. I got a chance to have sit-downs with each cast member Saturday and make sure they feel comfortable and connect with each person individually; which was long overdue. A couple of conversations the day before had really prompted me to go deeper with the cast and REALLY check in with them. Plus I think that on Thursday's rehearsal I had a lot of anxiety and was having to make adjustments about things that had not gone as planned.

This upcoming next few days are about being organized, promotions, tying up the loose ends on all the little things. I'm hoping my sleep will improve over the next few days as well. Oh my gosh, I need to my hair twisted soooo badly. And a pedicure.

8 days 'til Curtain...

I need new glasses. Maybe I should just clean them. Oh, okay, that's better. Got the outline for the programme done. Just need the last sponsor logos and "special thanks" names. Last night I was told that we have to use the upstairs room again tonight, because of the show that opens on Saturday. I know the other director, and my niece Marissa is in it; it's a little frustrating because we still have a good deal of work to do, and we were slated to have another tech rehearsal--which we really need. The main thing here is to stay calm and focused.

We'll have a couple of days to tighten and cut performances; then next week will be tech/dress and quick adaptation. Being flexible is necessary, as well as ensuring all of our needs are met.

We rehearsed the show last night, I tried to get through all the acts in two hours, but alas, it didn't happen. Tonight, we'll have a shorter warm up, then go right into Act III. From there, we'll go sequentially. Last night I needed the stage manager to be there to manage the props. My set builder hasn't been returning my calls since our missed meeting. Concerned. I believe we have to get a sound person back up; haven't seen or heard from the guy that's supposed to do it.

Marta, the costume designer, brought some clothes for some of the cast. She's really good at what she does and has made a difference in terms of the character looks. This show has a lot of costume changes.

I know we'll have great turnouts for the show. Just needing to breathe. All things are working in our favor.

9 days 'til curtain...

I am tired. Need more sleep. Yesterday, we had our first tech rehearsal and while I did "anticipate" it to be a little time-consuming and taxing on my nerves...dear lord...

The good news is that the cast has a natural flow and is doing great. I think once the set is built next Monday and they know all their entrances and exits, and any cuts I have to make for time; they will be spot on. We did a lot of work over the last couple of months; and that is really paying off.

The other things were that the house LIGHTING guy didn't show to the TECH rehearsal! (breathing) AND the set builder skipped an important meeting today, too. Thankfully, our stage manager's brother knows the board to do the lights. Then there was the sound...(help me lawd!) The actor's projections were good, I think I'll have to see about an overhead mic for the stage. That should be pretty easy. The sound cues are our next place of correction. I project that everything will be on point by Tuesday. I'm excited.

Today, my best friend Darice is coming up from L.A. It will be really nice to have her around. Today before rehearsal I have to start the program, start our next ad for the east bay express, make a list of things to get from Costco. Get some wine and sparkling juice...follow up about the radio shows, etc...

Everything I need is right within my reach, and comes to me freely. The ENTIRE Universe is conspiring for my good and the success of this show. Ashe!

12 Days 'til Curtain...

A lot is happening now; I have trainings this week at work. I have a crew meeting tomorrow at my house; and it's not clean. (Um, there's some anxiety) Then I have to finish the sound work tonight and stay off of my swollen ankle. I ate at mom's today she really made a great Easter meal. She made us a lemon cake for our rehearsal Saturday, too. she has been amazing supporter of me and the show. All of my family has. They've been terrific. I must say that I am truly blessed with the people that surround me.

Yesterday's rehearsal was very productive. We went through acts II and III fairly quickly; then we got a chance to get on the stage a little bit. We've been working in the green room for our rehearsals, so it was kinda like taking kids to the park after the rain stopped, they loved it. I enjoyed the intimacy of working in the room; and feel now is the time to put us on the stage. We all got a little punch-drunk after lunch; mostly everyone (myself included) was talking in a Jamaican accent--just silly...we had fun. We did a trust fall earlier in the day; not the one where you fall straight back, but the one where the group circles you and they gently push you from side to side. this is the first activity that I fully participated with the group in, too; I usually give the outline and observe them, ask questions or give directions. This was nice to participate in.

I'm just going to rest, and take care of things as they need to be.

14 Days 'til Curtain...

I woke up a little tired today. I still have a few things to do. Klara and I have to design the program, I have to finish the music. I'm gonna go over to my mom's to help her clean up for a little while. I have to go to Costco or Smart & Final for some snacks for tomorrow's rehearsal. I need to figure out what I'm gonna feed the cast for lunch...

Yesterday I wanted to KILL one of my cast members who will remain nameless; although I will say her character name rhymes with Mika, lol. She played an April Fool's joke telling me she wasn't coming to rehearsal. I was ready to flip a table over...seriously. Then she said "April Fool's" and I had to take my pretend blood pressure medicine, 'cause I was hot...

Speaking of flipping over tables, in Wednesday's rehearsal, we had been experimenting with Eli's reaction to the news about the girls. I told Clarence to just go for it. And he did! Very exciting! Right after that scene, it started hailing so hard, like all that energy brought down the hail. Amazing. We had to reel his reaction in a little bit after that; but over all, there is some AMAZING work happening. The characters are filling out and now adding layers of playfulness and comfort.

I'm reworking the ending now; as it stands now, it's too long. I need to tighten it up, so it doesn't linger so much. I do appreciate having a background in film and editing; I believe it has helped my sense of timing, and will contribute to this scene overall.